Top Ten Reasons Why Syntax Is Better Than Sex*

  1. It's more fun.

  2. If you don't get raising, then you're in control.

  3. Chains and binding don't have to be S&M.

  4. The cycle is strict and not monthly.

  5. You can do it top-down OR bottom-up.

  6. You can do it with cute gay guys.

  7. There are extra-positions.

  8. You get paid for it.

  9. You know right away who is good at it.

  10. The older you get, the more they want you.

Some extra reasons

  1. You can do it alone.

  2. Guys last longer.

  3. If you're a nerd, you do it better.

  4. You can do it by the book.

  5. You can choose the book.

  6. Obligatory it-insertion **

And my personal reason is... head movement is cyclic!

See the downloads page for my new paper on head movement.

Top Five Reasons Why OT Is Worse Than Sex

  1. You get friction only in obstruents.

  2. Your vowels keep getting lax.

  3. No matter how you constrain yourself, you always produce something.

  4. Too many candidates to consider.

  5. Difficult to play footsie with binary feet.

*DEMOCRACY.
This is a non-democratic page. If you think there is a reason I have missed (after all, I spend my time doing syntax), email it to me and I may put it here. In the true spirit of linguistic citation, credit will be given to someone else.

**
Courtesy of Chris Potts. As a female, I don't necessarily consider this an advantage.

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